Tonight we decided to take the boys into the city to sit on Santa's lap and tell them what they want. Bonus, I get a picture. Extra Bonus, the whole thing is free. Being the type of parents we are [bad] when Rainbow Man asked us where we had to go to see Santa, we told him "The North Pole."
"But that will take forever! We won't have enough gas to get there"
"I just filled up yesterday"
The whole trip into the city we strung the story of the North Pole. It would take many days to get there. We will have to make lots of yellow snow. We forgot to feed the cat... We had answers for Everything!
"But our car doesn't have enough horse powers to get through the snow." (Blue Boy)
"When the snow gets too deep, we are going to be using a dog sled honey."
Finally we get to the mall where Santa is waiting. Rainbow man comes to the conclusion we are going here for photos, not the North Pole after all. But being us [bad] we weren't yet ready to admit defeat on the the North Pole story.
"No no, we are just here for supplies, we need rope, pick axes and shovels."
"We have to climb the mountains to get to Santas house. Its very high up, it will take a long time to climb, in fact, you will probably miss your Christmas concert"
"But we won't have enough food!"
"We are going to buy some at the store here, and besides, if we run out, we can just eat Stuperman."
"You can't eat family! Its illegal!"
(Jitteryjoe and I had no idea we were breaking laws when we played 'who can get the worst rug burn!')
At this point, Jitteryjoe and I went from being just plain old run of the mill bad parents into horrible, nasty warp-your-kids-minds parents.
"Do you remember last time we went to the North Pole?" I asked Jitteryjoe, fully aware the children were listening. I have to hand it to Jitteryjoe, he caught on quick. Plus I can blame him because he started it!
"Oh yea, Wasn't John with us?"
"John??" asked Rainbow man.. "Who is he?"
And at this point we might have told Rainbow Man that John was his older brother who we might have taken to the North Pole, just like we are taking them. And we might have eaten John when we ran out of food.
In two days, when the photo's are ready to be picked up, please excuse the tearstained faces they sport. They miss John too.