Cheater!!

Sunday, March 04, 2007

I cheated on my diet today :o). I don't feel bad about it at ALL. Around noon, we decided to take the brats and play 18 holes of fishy *A SHARK MOMMY!!* mini golf. Stuperman was very adamant that the large goldfish in the water hazards surrounding the holes were sharks. It was greatly amusing to us and the people around.

By the way, the baby got a hole in one. He kicked our asses. Well not technically. See two holes he refused to play 'cus OMG SHARKS MOMMY!! and he had to stand and watch them swim, so JJ gave him a seven on both holes. (seven is the hole limit on this course) So really, I won with a score of 50 (par 38). But if we had given Stuperman his average score (3) for the two holes he would have scored a 48.

Pretty sad. We got our asses whupped by a two year old. It was his FIRST freaking time playing. Ever. He must take after his Grandma Marnee.

Anyway. To heal from our humiliation of being beaten by someone who cannot even put his own coat on, we decided to go for ice cream. Oh My God. Heavenly Hash. The first bit of sugar I have consumed since Monday. It was..well, heaven. Best.Orgasm.Ever.

Took the baby to the bathroom after his ice cream was done, he was very sticky. After I washed him up, He said he had to go, so I took him in a stall and he did his business and offered to flush for me.

HA! That was fucking hilarious. I've never seen him move so fast in my life! The toilet in question was one of those really loud whooshing ones. LOUD and WOOSHING. Super Loud. In a small tiled stall. That echos. A lot.

AHHHHH!!! That scary mommy! Potty Scary! We gotsta run!

If I only had it on video...

Oh , and did I mention that:

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15 Comments:

Blogger Sheila said...

Wow. Your artistic ability never ceases to amaze me!

Congrats on winning! Hold it over their heads for days and days. Keep telling them all that a GIRL beat them! Yeah yeah!!

1:31 AM, March 04, 2007  
Blogger Bluepaintred said...

Sheila Lol, would you believe I have had no formal training in drawing? Thats all natural talent !!

2:13 AM, March 04, 2007  
Blogger Blogarita said...

I hate scary toilets!

And tell me that the mini golf course was indoors and you didn't play in the snow.

8:07 AM, March 04, 2007  
Blogger Shelli said...

My kids were always afraid of the potty flushing. hee hee

NFW! Your youngest got 3 on most holes? I cannot believe that. You need to get him into golfing lessons. Did you play at an indoor course, because isn't it snowy and cold up there?

8:22 AM, March 04, 2007  
Blogger Fantastagirl said...

I bet the kids loved playing!

Hate loud toilets - Tink will not sit on an automatic toilets, unless I cover the sensor with a sticky note - they always flush when she is still sitting, and she will scream...yeah, not a pretty sight.

8:44 AM, March 04, 2007  
Blogger Nobody™ said...

I love mini golf. Mrs Nobody never wants to go play it. Maybe she's afraid she will lose to a 4 year old.

8:45 AM, March 04, 2007  
Blogger Mr. Fabulous said...

Now I know that he is really my son. We share the same gift for mini-golf...

11:18 AM, March 04, 2007  
Blogger Bluepaintred said...

blogarita Oh yes indoors!

shelli Only Stupe has ever been scared of the toilet. As for putting the baby in lessons im too pissed off that he beat me still!

Fantastagirl automattic ones piss me off. im glad tink agrees!

Nobody just give the four year old a handicapp. or mrs nobody.. how do handicapps work again?

Mr.Fab that and you have the same hair cut

11:44 AM, March 04, 2007  
Blogger The Flip Flop Mamma! said...

Yay! You whooped your family! I would be proud, I suck at mini golf! In real life and on video games!! Ugh. It is fun though!

1:41 PM, March 04, 2007  
Anonymous Monkee said...

I love mini golf...Can I come next time? I promise to lose.

2:23 PM, March 04, 2007  
Blogger Gabriella said...

thanks for stopping by my site with your positive words. I can only imagine the frustrations I'll feel when my daughter hits the teen years!

2:56 PM, March 04, 2007  
Blogger Bluepaintred said...

FlipFlop if it makes you feel better, I suck at video games too

Monkee as long as you promis not to swing from the trees, you can come :o)

Gabriella no problem. just remember there is way way more things to love baout kids then the things that annoy.

also. hot bubble baths.

4:16 PM, March 04, 2007  
Blogger Janna said...

When I was a little kid, I was afraid of loud toilets too! :)

Hi... I found your blog through Mr. Fab and decided to check it out. I just have to explain the anti-spam names he's using, 'cause you said you didn't know who the people were. (Probably somebody else has already helped you out with this, but what the heck). The names are from a tv show called Seinfeld... Just in case you haven't seen that show, Here's a page with a list of the cast members, so you can check it out. Mr. Fab LOVES Seinfeld. I think he loves it almost as much as lemurs. :)
Hope this helps. :)

5:17 PM, March 04, 2007  
Blogger Tug said...

Wow...here I was thinking it was NICE out there finally & you'd send it our way.

I love mini golf...my grandson is already taking lessons & loves it - you should get your kids started. We may have the next Tiger Woods!!

6:30 PM, March 04, 2007  
Blogger Coffee Mom said...

i hate noisy toilets too, but I especially hate the noisy ones that also splash water up, so gross

9:14 AM, March 06, 2007  

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