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Wednesday, July 18, 2007

Has everyone seen the photos of Paris Hilton floating around the net today? The ones where she and her dog are both dressed up in leopard print ... articles of uhm. Well you can't call it clothing..

Anyway. Is this proof that people end up with pets who look like their owners? Because while Tigger doesn't look like any of us, thanks to the miracle of razors, some days she acts just like me.

At her last veterinary appointment, we were told she was overweight. We tried to argue that she was just big boned, but the Doc wasn't buying it. Too bad... I had a bridge to sell...

When we got home, still disgusted with the Quack* of a doctor we had seen, we started to notice that Tigger was now unable to hop up to the bed. Or the couch. or uhm. Her feet.

I was OK with it becuase her dragging belly meant that there was no longer any need for me to sweep.

Regardless, The Husband decided it was time to cut off the all you can eat kibble buffet.

We switched to feeding her the stinky wet stuff at twelve and twelve.

At about eleven, both AM and PM, Tigger starts crying and pacing and biting our ankles. I'm pretty sure she thinks she is going to starve to death if we didn't drop whatever the hell we insignificant humans might be doing and feed her dammit! By the time each 12:00 shows up on the clock I am ready to tape her mouth shut.

I laughed So. Hard. today at noon, when she ran full tilt into the pantry door as I tried to get it open to feed her. She tried to pretend nothing had happened by turning her back to me and licking her ass, But I saw. I SAW YOU TIGGER! You are a disgrace to the cat family. Always land on their feet my ass!

But I am pretty sure she was laughing at me just now when I smashed my nose bloody opening the fridge just now in search of chocolate.

Don't worry. I found the chocolate.

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12 Comments:

Blogger Sheila said...

My cats have the exact same symptoms as yours does! Maybe these two cats are yours also?!

12:17 AM, July 19, 2007  
Blogger Mr. Fabulous said...

Sacrificing the body for chocolate. I am proud of you!

3:53 AM, July 19, 2007  
Blogger Not a Granny said...

My dog can't jump on the bed anyomre. Since my surgery I can't lift him up right now. We bought the doggy stairs. Now I sit on the bed and entice him up the stairs with dog treats...where have I gone wrong?

4:58 AM, July 19, 2007  
Blogger Avitable said...

Maybe you should only get chocolate at 12 and 12.

5:50 AM, July 19, 2007  
Blogger Shelli said...

Our Tigger's belly dragged on the ground, too. We kept the 24 hour kibble buffet though. If we hadn't, our other kitty would have starved to death. Tigger would never had let her have any food if we did that.

6:12 AM, July 19, 2007  
Blogger Bluepaintred said...

Sheila Maybe. Do they bite their nails?

Mr.Fab ...mmmm... it was a Mint Aero. There isn't much I would not sacrifice for one of those!

Not A Granny You haven't done a thing wrong. Your dog is just nervous around the new and perky boobs!

Avitable HRUMPH! there is no need to get nasty!

Shelli that is one of our worries when we get a dog. Will tigger steal the pups food? Do cats like dog food?

11:19 AM, July 19, 2007  
Blogger Webmiztris said...

my cats will walk all over me and knock things off my dresser until we feed them in the mornings. little fuckers! they're so impatient! it's a good thing they're cute. ;)

11:46 AM, July 19, 2007  
Blogger Lynda said...

But I am pretty sure she was laughing at me just now when I smashed my nose bloody opening the fridge just now in search of chocolate.

Tigger has no right to laugh, unless you licked your butt and pretended it didn't happen.

11:48 AM, July 19, 2007  
Blogger Tug said...

I heard a commedian say something about being 'big boned' once...have you ever seen a fat skeleton?

Guess you had to be there.

DID you lick your butt?

11:54 AM, July 19, 2007  
Anonymous metalmom said...

She's not fat! She's Fluffy!

At least you found the chocolate!

1:20 PM, July 19, 2007  
Blogger Coffee Mom said...

To answer your question about weither cats eat dog food, YES!!! they do. Our cat B.J is "big boned" to, but there is no sense in me cutting back the food cause he just eats the dogs and then the dog would starve (the dog can't afford not eating because he is still skinny from uncaring previous owners)

5:03 PM, July 19, 2007  
Blogger Fantastagirl said...

At least you got the chocolate.

8:14 PM, July 19, 2007  

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