And I thought, Maybe I Should Call

Friday, November 16, 2007

Tricia : Hello, Western Canadian Lottery Corporation, This is Tricia Speaking, how may I help you tonight?

Bluepaintred : Hi. My name is Bluepaintred* And I have a gambling problem.

Tricia : I'm so glad you called us tonight Bluepaintred. Reaching out for help is the first step in overcoming this addiction. Now, how would you describe your problem?

Bluepaintred : Well I bought a few of those one dollar scratch and win lottery tickets and -

Tricia : Do you gamble only with lottery tickets or are there other sources in which you gamble?

Bluepaintred : Well. Once, when I had just turned 18 My dad took me to a bar, becuase I was old enough and I put a quarter in a machiny thingy, but bells and stuff started going off and I thought I broke it, so I hid and refused to answer when the bartender asked who had done it! Now, just to be safe, I just play scratch tickets.

Tricia : Uhm. OK. How often do you buy -

Bluepaintred : So the thing is. My gambling problem. Last night I bought a few tickets, and I scratched them all, but I didn't win. What's with that?

Tricia : Well it's called gambling becuase you often do not win.

Bluepaintred : Yes I realize that. But I bought and paid for the tickets and then I scratched them, and then, there was just nothing.

Tricia : OK. Have you been to our website? We publish the odds on all of our Scratch Lotto tickets and -

Bluepaintred : Yes. Scratch Lotto. I bough them, and scratched them and did not win. Thats my Problem.

Tricia : OK, So when a person gambles they sometimes do not -

Bluepaintred : You see, I scratched with a nickel. And normally I use a dime. Is that what the problem was?

Tricia : Well. I can't see what difference that would mak-

Bluepaintred : Well. Is it becuase I scratched up and down and not left to right? My friends friend told her that you have to scratch them a certain way. And really my only problem here is with gambling. I just don't understand this. I bought the tickets and then...Nothing!

Tricia : Ok. Listen to me for a minute. When you gamble, it can cause problems becuase you do not win, and then you have nothing to show for the money you have spent.

Bluepaintred : Yes! Exactly! I bought them. I read the back.. here let me get it, I will read the back to you and-

Tricia : Ma'am? Listen to me for just one minute. You will not win on every Scratch lotto Ticket you buy.

Bluepaintred : No?

Tricia : No. That is why it is called gambling.

Bluepaintred : Well then. I think I have a problem with gambling becuase I bought them. I paid for them in cash. I took them home and scratched them all. And I didn't win. See? This is a problem with gambling.

Tricia : You know. Maybe I can get my supervisor here to talk to you for a minute...

And that's when I hung up.

The best way to do this is to go into quiet place, place the call and use the Speaker Phone function so that you can record the words. It is IMPOSSIBLE to write as fast as they talk. Also? Kick your husband out of the so called quiet room so his manly giggles don't ruin it for you.

*not my real name

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Blogger Sheila said...

Gambling is a problem when you don't win!! :(

And, I really thought your name was Bluepaintred... I am sad now.

12:47 AM, November 17, 2007  
Anonymous squirrel said...

LOL. That sounded like a phone call my husband could have made this morning when checking his lotto numbers!

9:48 AM, November 17, 2007  
Blogger Shelli said...

You did NOT do that, did you?! You are so naughty!

1:49 PM, November 17, 2007  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i wander what the convo would have been like if you had spoken to the supervisor

5:30 PM, November 17, 2007  
Blogger Robin said...

That's why I don't gamble, when I spend money I like to bring something home with me...or eat it.

Did you really do that you crazy bitch?

5:40 PM, November 17, 2007  
Blogger Nobody™ said...

you need help.

8:42 PM, November 17, 2007  
Anonymous Katie said...

Rofl, that poor lady! She's probably quit over that! :P

12:06 AM, November 18, 2007  
Blogger Avitable said...


1:24 PM, November 18, 2007  
Anonymous fracas said...

You are so damn funny. I hope Santa brings you something really wicked good.

3:08 PM, November 18, 2007  
Blogger Bluepaintred said...

Sheila I Know! And I really am sorry about the name...

Squirrel LOL. So I take it you did not win either?

Shelli Sometimes, I get board. Besides if they have a blog, now they have great blogging material!

Sponge Bob HEH. I didn't stay on long enough to find out!

Robin I am NOT crazy! I was just board

Nobody So... can you help me pick winning numbers?

Katie Oh, I dunno. I think if I was a call center person I would be more amused by it than anything..

Avitable Awww. thanks!

Fracas I asked for a heated mattress cover. He BETTER bring it or so help me...

Pee ess: Noticed the linky love Frac. Thanks! Think anyone will have some winning numbers to give me?

4:46 PM, November 18, 2007  
Blogger Fantastagirl said...

The winning numbers, I don't think such things exist....

8:51 PM, November 18, 2007  
Anonymous Julia said...

Hahahahahahaha! ROFLMAO!

You bad, bad, bad, naughty chick, you! I can't believe you really did this, but then again, on good days I pick up the phone when someone calles and instead of "hi" I say "local crematory, what can I do for you?" teehee, you should hear the difference in people's voice *gg*

Greets Julia

3:32 AM, November 19, 2007  
Blogger Robin said...

Like light as a feather stiff as a board? ;)

6:59 AM, November 19, 2007  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

LMFAO! This is the best prank I've ever heard of! You are BRILLIANT!

1:30 PM, November 19, 2007  
Anonymous Ms. Understood said...

I hate how caller ID has ruined the joy that was prank calling

4:18 PM, November 19, 2007  
Blogger carrie said...

OMG That's grand!!!!!!!!!!

7:15 PM, November 19, 2007  
Blogger Tenacious B said...




I bow to you.

10:29 AM, November 20, 2007  
Blogger Marilyn said...

This is the funniest thing I've read in a long time!

We have some sleeping bags that have the company's 800 number printed on the pull tabs. Andy is always threatening to call that number and tell them he's being eaten by a bear... What the heck good is that number if you're camping?

2:12 PM, November 23, 2007  

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