My Alarm Clock Works fine; I'm Broken

Friday, February 02, 2007

Ever since I can remember, I do not, can not, wake to alarm clocks. Say my name, just once, and I'm up like a light. My Dad used to stand at the top of the stairs and wake me by calling my name. My job was to get the coffee on before my mom woke up. When can I start my boys on doing that for me?

I've never needed an alarm clock. I had my dad to wake me as a child, When I went off to University, I lived the first year with my Granny and she woke me. When I moved in with JitteryJoe We both sort of ignored the whole OMG 8 AM class and slept in.

We got lucky with our boys. They weren't morning people as babies. For them to sleep in till 10, 11 AM was perfectly normal, even expected. I liked that. A lot. When Rainbow Man started kindergarten, I enrolled him in the afternoon class so I could continue my love affair with sleep.

The switch from Afternoon Kindergarten to how the hell am I supposed to get a two year old a two month old and a five year old ready for a six block walk ~ out the door by 8:30 AM routine, was pure hell. It's better now. Except for Fridays.

Every Friday, JitteryJoe starts work at the in-human hour of 5:30 AM. And since we live in a town outside the city where he works, he gets up at 4:30 am.

Since I don't wake to an alarm clock, I have to get up with him too. Normally, I throw on whatever clothes are laying on the bedroom floor, often realising later that my shirt is on inside out, my socks don't match and that I forgot,once again, to put on panties.

Without opening my eyes I swipe the nearest pillow and blanket and curl up on the couch and head back into dream land. JitteryJoe unlocks the front door and at 7:30, HG's (the girl I babysit) Dad comes in and wakes me up to drop her off.

HG didn't come this Friday. So I was smart. I e-mailed my Mom at 5AM and asked her to call and wake me up so I could get Rainbow Man off to school. Promptly at 7:30 She called me. Sounding that cheerful at that time in the morning is grounds for murder you know. I swore to her that I was up, I was out of bed. But I lied. Just one more minute I told myself. Just one more second covered up in my ball of warn blankies and millions of soft smooshy pillows. Then I would get up, Honest.

8:55 AM. Rainbow Man Wakes me.

"Mommy, aren't I usually gone to school by now?"

Total Calories Burned Today: 362.31
Total Accumulative Calories Burned: 922.410
Total Accumulative Miles Jogged: 11.964


This Just In!! A contest at 5 minutes for mom as well as a contest at Mr.Fabs Place!! go enter them! NOW!!

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Blogger Blogarita said...

Spouse Guy gets up at 5:00 every morning, except in the summer, when they start work at 6:00. Then he gets up at 4:00 or 4:30, depending on how far the job site is from home.

Sometimes I get up with him, sometimes I don't. But I can never seem to sleep past 8:00 or so, even if I had trouble sleeping the night before.

9:43 PM, February 02, 2007  
Blogger Sheila said...

I'm a selective listener, even when I sleep. I can sleep through all sorts of crazy noises, but other things wake me up out of the deepest sleep! And, like you, I'm all about 'just one more minute'... but, I don't have children to get off to school! :P

9:52 PM, February 02, 2007  
Blogger Bluepaintred said...

Blogarita Ew.Ew. Ew. My perfect day would be sleeping till 11, then an afternoon nap, and top it off with a cat nap in the evening. I like sleep!

Sheila Oye, at least this year he walks to school, and I can go back to bed after he goes..which is something I very often do ;o)

9:59 PM, February 02, 2007  
Blogger Tug said...

And 5 days a week, I'm up at 4flipping30. 5 at the latest. If ever you need a wake up call, let me know - I do NOT check my e-mail that early though. ;-)

Your perfect day sounds like mine...weekends, I sleep in.

YEA for you on the DDR (is that what it's called? Dickdildorawr??) LOL

10:42 PM, February 02, 2007  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thats it!!! I am phoning you BEFORE I take my kids to school... EVERY FRIDAY. My kids have NEVER been sleep in kids. If my son sleeps till 7 then he is sick... EVERY FRIDAY... you know I mean it!!!! maaaaahhhhhaaaaahhhh!!! I have to take hubby to work at 7 I'm up at 6. When we lived in the hell of a small town, we were up at 5. You know I will. Just you wait, and the bonus, it's local!!!!!

3:03 AM, February 03, 2007  
Blogger Finn said...

I'm so not a morning person. I better if I wake up on my own, but it's still iffy.

I can see myself doing exactly what you did. Someone should pointed all this out to me before I decided to breed. Ugh.

8:07 AM, February 03, 2007  
Blogger Mr. Fabulous said...

You lied to you mom?

For shame!

Thanks for the contest shout out!

11:49 AM, February 03, 2007  
Blogger Shelli said...

Oops! That sucks. Did you blame yourself when you told the school why he was late? I would have said, in my angriest voice, "Damn, stupid kid wouldn't get his lazy ass out of bed." *snort* Too funny.

4:01 PM, February 03, 2007  
Blogger Bluepaintred said...

Tug ew ew ew ew ew ew ewe ew ewe eweweweweweweewewew five days a WEEEEK? thats just wrong


RoxDar Actually on fridays id like that :o)

Finn yea no one showed us the fine print on breeding either

Mr.fab yea pfft, she loves me, she will fogive me

cus i am cute

Shelli heh i sent a note that read "Rainbowman is late because i slept in. sorry"

5:02 PM, February 03, 2007  
Blogger Bluepaintred said...

50 mis DDR... thats sixteen comments accounted for... so uhm.. I WIN lol

5:11 PM, February 03, 2007  
Blogger Lori said...

I am an early riser everyday even on the weekends.

I hate it I want to sleep in sometimes but I never do. ;)

9:49 PM, February 03, 2007  
Blogger Fantastagirl said...

My kids? Up by 6:30 or 7 am every.single.morning.

Only when they are sick, do they sleep in.

I would prefer my work world started at noon, not 8 am.

9:53 PM, February 03, 2007  
Blogger Sponge_Bobs_Pants said...

the whole ddr thing is awesome blue...and wow you are just like me i hate getting up in the mornings and am blessed with a wonderful child who enjoys letting her dearest mommy sleep in till like 10...

9:56 PM, February 03, 2007  
Blogger Shelli said...

Total Calories Burned Today: 362.31
Total Accumulative Calories Burned: 922.410
Total Accumulative Miles Jogged: 11.964

How do you calculate that?

11:38 PM, February 03, 2007  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Okay-that's it-the gloves are off!next time I wake you up it will be with a song-my voice is such that you will be forced to arise in order to avoid the inevitable nightmares that seem to follow anyone graced with hearing my voice-it
will make fingernails on a blackboard seem like the S_______ symphony-Honey-you've been warned!
Luv & Hugs-MM
P.S-Song choice will be "Did u Know that you're my Hero?"-originally done by Bett Middler in Beaches

7:18 AM, February 04, 2007  
Blogger Friglet said...

I hate waking up to get my kids ready for school. I'm thinking of sending them all to boarding school so it's not my problem anymore.

8:40 PM, February 05, 2007  

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